(An excerpt from the original essay.)
You spoiled him rotten, didn’t you? Probably gave him all the things you never had, showering him with attention and praise, the way your parents never did. Then you patted yourself on the back for a job well done, right? Meanwhile, he was busy becoming a household name – only, not for achieving greatness or acts of kindness, but for doing the unspeakable. Why didn’t you do something?! Couldn’t you see the monster he had become? Maybe if you’d been a better mother, a better father…
Those were my thoughts as I stood next to Scott Peterson’s parents, judging them ruthlessly as we stood in line about to order lunch, my baby’s stroller blocking their path.
It was a last minute decision to visit Filoli Gardens on that unusually warm day in July. Like most days as a new mom, I was nervous about doing the right thing for my baby. Was it too hot to take her out today? Did I choose the right sun block? Should I bring the stroller or the Baby Bjorn? Which would be cooler? Maybe I should bring the tent for added protection. Was there SPF 60 available? If I’d only gone to the right drugstore… and countless other questions and fears, and it wasn’t even 10:00am yet.